Movie Quotes Blog

Steve-O:
You know it’s when like your parents said “I’m not mad at you, just disappointed” You know that hurt so much more.

[Laughing]

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Butterbean:
Hit me once at least.

[Johnny Knoxville punches Butterbean in the face]

Butterbean:
There ya go.

[Butterbean punches Knoxville unconscious]

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Steve-O:
Dude they’re telling me the parasites in there can f*cking crawl through your anything like even my dick hole, I’m like so I wanted to put like a rubber on, but no one has a rubber. Dude f*cking after all that pussy and my dick goes down because of this sh*t

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Johnny Knoxville:
[laughing at Dave England who has soiled himself] Oh sh*t, I’m taking a cab back to the hotel!

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Johnny Knoxville:
I think I’m a little concussed.

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Steve-O:
[while preparing the wasabi to snort it] Chopsticks are so *stupid*!

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Johnny Knoxville:
Is this the worst you’ve ever had to go boom-boom?

Dave England:
No man. I sh*t my pants at the fair.

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Rakeyohn:
[referring to bungee wedgie] This is worse than the hanging.

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Ryan Dunn:
I’m not too excited about this skit, it’s not my favorite I’ve ever done, because there’s a toy car in my butt. But this is the “Butt X-Ray”.

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[while viewing the apparatus for the “Bungee Wedgie” stunt]

Rick Kosick:
This isn’t gonna work!

Jeff Tremaine:
It might…

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[Johnny Knoxville returns the badly damaged rental car]

Rental car attendant:
Whose car is this?

Johnny Knoxville:
This is your guy’s car. I rented it from you earlier.

Rental car attendant:
Yes… What?

Johnny Knoxville:
Yeah, I hit a dog.

Rental car attendant:
A dog isn’t gonna do all that.

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Johnny Knoxville:
[referring to firework going off] That almost hit Loomis in the face!

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Ryan Dunn:
[after many failed intro attempts, sigh] Goddamn, this is the BMX tug-of-war.

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[a man tries to help Spike Jonze after his scooter zooms downhill]

Man:
You all right?

Spike Jonze:
Yeah.

Man:
You have… Your brakes go out?

Spike Jonze:
Yeah. The whole thing doesn’t work.

Man:
Really?

Spike Jonze:
Will you push me to the top? I wanna do it again.

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Johnny Knoxville:
This is the Muscle Simulator.

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Steve-O:
I am so glad I turned this idea down.

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Ryan Dunn:
I’m Ryan Dunn, and I’m about to get the sh*t kicked out of me by a girl.

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Steve-O:
We wanted to see if you would run!

Ryan Dunn:
I’m not running anywhere with a toy car shoved up my butt.

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Steve-O:
Hi it’s cold in Japan, so were going to warm ourselves up with some fireworks.

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Johnny Knoxville:
That was my flesh!

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Johnny Knoxville:
Is Butterbean okay?

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Chris Pontius:
[putting the “Muscle Stimulator” on a sensitive area] Right, let’s zap my nuts.

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Ryan Dunn:
So how did a car toy get there?

Cuban-dude doctor:
Maybe you stuck it up your ass.

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Steve-O:
[laughing] I ran straight into a crocodile! Oh, my God!

Jeff Tremaine:
Why can’t you walk on a tightrope?

Steve-O:
[shrugs, scratches head] I dunno.

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Johnny Knoxville:
That had bad news written all over it.

Bam Margera:
Dunn can’t drive for sh*t!

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Johnny Knoxville:
[dazed, holding head after golf cart accident] I don’t know what happened. I just remember we went in the air and the next thing I know, I’m just… f*cked.

Bam Margera:
Dude, you were hauling so much ass!

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Jason Acua:
I’m Weeman and this is a big cone.

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Lance Bangs:
[vomiting, disgusted at Dave England soiling himself] I had to sit there while he shat!

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Johnny Knoxville:
Did you see the way I stopped the beanbag with my stomach? That’s instinct. You can’t teach that.

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Bam Margera:
[from extended footage, on phone] How much does Rake hate mustard?

[to cameraman]

Bam Margera:
This is Rake’s mom and she says I wouldn’t be able to have children in my future.

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Steve-O:
[to Johnny Knoxville] I got an ember fell right on my cornhole, dude!

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Johnny Knoxville:
[after returning the smashed up car] But I returned it with a full tank of gas.

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Chris Pontius:
I guess I don’t have any last words. I’m just gonna kill myself once I lose my wiener.

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[on “Butt-x-ray”]

Steve-O:
If Ryan was an animal, what would he be?

Manny Puig:
This doesn’t happen in nature.

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Johnny Knoxville:
[after being beat up by Butterbean] Is Butterbean OK?

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Sidney Pudney:
Take a running jump at yourself, as the monkey said to the performing flea.

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Sidney Pudney:
That’s a nice bit of junk, as the monkey said to the Chinese sailor.

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Sidney Pudney:
No hard feelings, as the monkey said to the… oh what’s the use, you never laughed at my jokes anyway.

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Sidney Pudney:
Dry up, as the monkey said to the leaky tap.

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Sidney Pudney:
I was selling off war surplus before the war even started!

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Sidney Pudney:
Beat it, as the monkey said to the egg whisk.

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Sidney Pudney:
What’s cooking, as the monkey said to the cannibal chief.

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Sidney Pudney:
Search me, as the monkey said to his mate.

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Sidney Pudney:
See you in the dock sometime, as the monkey said to the tramp steamer.

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Sidney Pudney:
Hop it, as the monkey said to the kangaroo.

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Eugene Meltsner:
Incredible! Some people will do anything to make a sale…

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John Avery Whittaker:
Sounds like your father simply knows that folks ought to store their treasures in heaven.

Dylan:
[to himself] Great… adults who compare notes.

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