Movie Quotes Blog

Frank:
We’re going streaking.

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Frank:
A little housewarming gift.

Mitch:
I actually gave this to you for your wedding.

Frank:
This model?

Mitch:
That exact one.

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Beanie:
Who’s life is ruined?

Mitch:
Lets see. Blue’s dead. Franks divorced. I’ve lost my house. Nicole thinks I’m a total jackass. And we got nine kids who are gonna get expelled from school and you’re not even gonna help them out.

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Woman:
[holding a grocery bag] What are you doing?

Frank:
You tell anyone about this and I’ll f*cking kill you. I’m kidding, I’m kidding, we’ll have him home by midnight.

[reaches into the grocery bag and takes out cheese balls]

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Frank:
Blue’s over there. But he’s wasted.

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Mitch:
Sorry, your seatbelt seems to be broken. What do you recommend I do?

Cab Driver:
I recommend you stop being such a faggot. You’re in the backseat.

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Marissa:
Just as long as you promise to take it easy.

Frank:
What do you mean?

Marissa:
You know exactly what I mean. You’ve come along way since Frank the Tank and we don’t want him coming back do we?

Frank:
Honey, Frank the Tank is not coming back, ok? That part of me is over. Water under the bridge. I promise.

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Nicole:
I heard one of your pledges died. Is that true?

Mitch:
Well, yes but Blue was really old. And I feel pretty confident when we get the autopsy back it’ll say natural causes.

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Beanie:
Because this is a very big idea my friends. We’re talking about a non-exclusive egalitarian brotherhood where community status and more importantly age have bearing whatsoever.

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Garry:
He left me with a little something called herpes. Which I then gave to the dog. But thats neither here nor there.

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Frank:
In this corner, weighing in at 110 pounds and pushing 89 years of age and the recent recipient of a brand new plastic hip, Joseph “Blue” Polaski.

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Waiter:
You are beautiful. But no offense, he, he is the king. You are having pie and coffee with a living legend.

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Garry:
You know, when I get back there, I’m going to show you something called crouching tiger, hidden penis.

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Mitch:
[after finding out that it’s in the bylaw that the only way to keep the fraternity is take a course of tests but Beanie does not want to do it]

Beanie:
Who’se lives are ruined?

Mitch:
Well, see. Blue’s dead. Frank’s divorced. I lost my house. Nicole thinks I’m a total jackass. And now we got nine kids who are gonna get expelled from school, and you’re not even gonna help them.

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Mitch:
Wow. Cheese. Is that you?

Dean Pritchard:
Hello, Mitch. Bernard. I see you guys haven’t changed much.

Beanie:
Who’s this guy?

Mitch:
Beanie, you remember Cheese, Rodney’s kid brother?

Dean Pritchard:
Actually, my name’s not Cheese anymore. It’s Gordon Pritchard.

Beanie:
Oh yeah. Cheeeeeese. Yeah, didn’t we lock you in a dumpster one time?

Dean Pritchard:
Yea, I got out.

Beanie:
Cool man. Good. Glad you did.

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Frank:
You know I was thinking we could go back home… have some dinner and pop in the Sisqo CD… no? Weren’t thinking that? Ok.

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Frank:
[Crying] You’re my boy, Blue! You’re my boy.

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Peppers:
She’s a beauty, ain’t she?

Frank:
Yeah, what kind of gun is this?

Peppers:
It’s a tranquilizer gun. If any of these little f*ckers decide to freak out on the kids, I get to take them down. Ain’t that right?

Peppers:
[yank’s on the mule’s reigns]

Peppers:
Oh, what? That’s what I thought. Shut up.

[Frank cocks the gun]

Peppers:
Hey, hey. Careful with that. That’s the most powerful tranq gun on the market. Got her in Mexico.

Frank:
Cool.

Peppers:
Yeah, it is cool. They say it can puncture the skin of a rhino from…

Frank:
[Frank shoots himself in the neck with the dart]

Peppers:
YES! That’s awesome!

Frank:
What?

Peppers:
You just took one in the jugular, man.

Frank:
What? I did.

[feeling his neck]

Peppers:
YES!

Frank:
Oh my god. Is this bad? Is this bad?

Peppers:
You better pull that sh*t out man. That sh*t is not cool.

Frank:
Wait. What? Pull what out?

Peppers:
You got a f*cking dart in your neck man.

Frank:
[laughing] You’re… you’re crazy man. I like you, but you’re crazy.

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Gordon Pritchard:
Half these guys don’t even go here and that one guy is like ninety.

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Beanie:
Good luck to everybody. Nice to know you all and I’ll see you around campus.

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Booker:
We’ve been waiting all semester for you to ask us.

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Jerry:
What will you have to do with the university?

Beanie:
Legally speaking there will be a loose affiliation. But, we will give nothing back to the academic community. As well as provide no public service of any kind. This much I promise you.

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Wedding Singer:
[singing] f*ckin’ every now and then I fall apart and I need you now tonight. I f*ckin’ need you more than ever.

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Frank:
Blue, how come there’s no ice in my lemonade?

[throws the lemonade into the pool]

Blue:
Sorry, sir.

Frank:
Drop down and give me ten. Now!

Blue:
[bends down into a push-up position] Yes, sir.

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Beanie:
Spanish what the hell are you doing?

Spanish:
I’m just going to get some water. This suit is crazy hot, yo.

Beanie:
Put your head back on. That can be very traumatic for the kids.

Spanish:
You’re right, I’m sorry, sir.

Beanie:
Don’t sorry me, babe. And shake the tail when you walk. You’re better than that.

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Therapist:
Frank, this is a safe place. A place where we can feel free sharing our feelings. Think of my office as a nest in a tree of trust and understanding. We can say anything here.

Frank:
Anything? Well, uh I guess I, deep down, am feeling a little confused. I mean, suddenly, you get married, and you’re supposed to be this entirely different guy. I don’t feel different. I mean, take yesterday for example. We were out at the Olive Garden for dinner, which was lovely. And uh, I happen to look over at a certain point during the meal and see a waitress taking an order, and I found myself wondering what color her underpants might be. Her panties. Uh, odds are they are probably basic white, cotton, underpants. But I sort of think well maybe they’re silk panties, maybe it’s a thong. Maybe it’s something really cool that I don’t even know about. You know, and uh, and I started feeling… what? what I thought we were in the trust tree in the nest, were we not?

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Dean Pritchard:
Ladies and Gentleman, please welcome, the co-host of CNN’s Crossfire, famed political consultant, the raging Cajun, Mr. James Carville

James Carville:
Thank you, Thank you Dean Pritchard. It’s an honor and a pleasure to be here sir.

Dean Pritchard:
Topic number one. What is your position on the role of government in supporting innovation in the field of biotechnology?

James Carville:
Well Dean, I’m? I’m glad that you asked that question…

Frank:
Uhhh… Actually, I’d like to jump in and take that one Jimmy, If you don’t mind.

James Carville:
Have at it, Hoss.

Frank:
[Frank takes a drink of water, makes a funny face and grunts] Recent research has shown that empirical evidence for globalization of corporate innovation is very limited and as a corollary the market for technologies is shrinking. As a world leader, it’s important for America to provide systematic research grants for our scientists. I believe strongly there will always be a need for us to have a well articulated innovation policy with emphasis on human resource development. Thank you.

Frank:
[Frank grunts, makes a face and goes limp]

[audience applauds]

Frank:
What happened? I blacked out

Dean Pritchard:
That was interesting. ha ha. Thank you very much. And, uh, your rebuttal? Mr. Carville.

James Carville:
Oh… It… We… have no response. That was perfect.

Frank:
That’s the way you do it! That’s the way you debate!

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Beanie:
Don’t say sorry to me, Frank. Say it to the baby.

Frank:
Sorry, baby.

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Frank:
I told my wife I wouldn’t drink tonight. Besides, I got a big day tomorrow. You guys have a great time.

College Student:
A big day? Doing what?

Frank:
Well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, we’re going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don’t know, I don’t know if we’ll have enough time.

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Mitch:
I wasn’t looking for a girl like that.

Beanie:
Well, Columbus wasn’t looking for America, my man, but that turned out to be pretty okay for everyone.

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Marissa:
That’s really, loud.

Frank:
Yeah, thanks. Took the restrictor plate off to give the Red Dragon a little more juice. But it’s not exactly street legal, so keep it on the down low.

[waving to a neighbor]

Frank:
Hey Mike!

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Waiter:
Love, it’s a motherf*cker, huh?

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Mitch:
All I want to do is get some f*cking sleep.

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Frank:
That’s how you do it. That’s how you debate.

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Beanie:
Weensie, you’re on lifeguard duty.

Weensie:
Sir, I can’t swim, sir.

Frank:
Speak when spoken to.

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Mitch Martin:
True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend…

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[deleted scene]

Beanie:
Can you do me a favor and tell Mitch it’s perfectly okay to have sex with a 17-year-old?

Lara Campbell:
Oh, yeah. It’s fine, if you’re 18 or you live in Louisiana.

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Frank:
Yea, I’m cool either way. I just have to run it by Marissa.

[Mitch and Beanie give him a weird look]

Frank:
I’m messing with you guys.

Beanie:
Not funny. Not funny. And now the baby is upset.

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Mitch:
So what are you? Campus security?

Dean Pritchard:
Try again.

Beanie:
Jevohah Witness?

Dean Pritchard:
I’m the Dean. Dean Pritchard.

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Mitch:
I’ve had a hell of a day and even worse week. And all I want to do is get some f*cking sleep.

Beanie:
Whoa. Whoa. Why the F-ing? Why in front of the kid? All ya gotta do is say “earmuffs” to him, and you can say “f*ck, sh*t, bitch.”

Frank:
Cock. Balls.

Beanie:
I’m just trying to make a point, Frank. You don’t have to celebrate it.

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